Kuso no Genso. 糞の幻想

 Shit Illusions 

It was gone and here it is again

Everything we knew it would be

The good bad and ugly

Shared its face and I see it

Kuso <糞>

It rises 

Bitterness and lies

So Fuck

It comes

Once upon your lies 

A prince, a king and a commoner

All share the same fate

A Dad, a mom and their first offspring

All share the same fate

Death

The final

The eternal

Goodbye

What was then is no longer now

And here we are pretending 

That our truth and honesty

Will find a mirror and see

Genso  <幻想>

They are

Full of the bullshit

God damn

This is 

Goodbye

And fuck all of this shit

A prince, a king and a commoner

All share the same fate

A Dad, a mom and their first offspring

All share the same fate

You don’t know

He doesn’t, she doesn’t 

They don’t know

I don’t, they don’t 

A prince, a king and a commoner

All share the same fate

A Dad, a mom and their first offspring

All share the same fate

Good to Cry

 

Sometimes it’s good to cry

For the past that happened

And the future yet to come 

Sometimes it’s good to cry 

About things in the past 

And what could be tomorrow. 

Have you ever mourned

A loved one

Laying in an urn or casket

It burns your soul

Way Beyond recognition. 

He was the grounding

In my elastic life

Then gone done

Goodbye 

We cry because we weren’t worthy

And he’s dust

In his wanted resting place. 

Sometimes it’s good to cry

For the past that happened

And the future yet to come 

Sometimes it’s good to cry 

About things in the past 

And what could be tomorrow. 

What is emotion. 

Is it done?

Can I ask someone who’s greater 

What is your goal 

Emotional destruction. 

She’s my very soul

The wind within my sail

Once I cry

Goodbye

Only she is worthy of this 

Now she’s gone

I don’t know what to do now

Sometimes it’s good to cry

For the past that happened

And the future yet to come 

Sometimes it’s good to cry 

About things in the past 

And what could be tomorrow. 

How to be

How to adult

To be a man

I’m an orphan 

Left In this life alone. 

I forsake it all

All the secrets 

All the truths

Let me be me for once 

I’ll sit In silence and listen

Sometimes it’s good to cry

For the past that happened

And the future yet to come 

Sometimes it’s good to cry 

About things in the past 

And what could be tomorrow. 

Warning Signs

Where did I go wrong 

Where did I go right

When did I make a move that was right

Where did I mistake love

Where did I give up

When did I make a move that was right

Yield 

Watch your move

It could crash 

Who was that 

Stop

And observe 

A whiplash

Who was that 

Here and then and you’re gone

A phantom a fantasy

A liar to my truth

The signs all say

Caution caution 

Hashtags warning signs 

Where did I go wrong 

Where did I go right

When did I make a move that was right

Where did I mistake love

Where did I give up

When did I make a move that was right

Merge

Into me 

Despite sight 

You are mine

Left

Is the exit 

If you want

In this time

Once upon a time but

They are  lies we tell ourselves 

Just like we all do so

My soul still says 

Caution caution

Hashtag  warning signs

Where did I go wrong 

Where did I go right

When did I make a move that was right

Where did I mistake love

Where did I give up

When did I make a move that was right

All these warnings signs 

How did I miss it

I followed the signs and kept on

Knowing it was a a failure. 

Where did I go wrong 

Where did I go right

When did I make a move that was right

Where did I mistake love

Where did I give up

When did I make a move that was right

Being

You’re only 21 just once and then you’re 35

And you question what did you do with your life 

It’s not enough to be me now 

You’re full of lies and fantasies 

You can dance dance drop a beat 

But you’re still here 

Being ignorant

Taking a ride without a cover.

Right now...

All I want is to be...

Being 

You find yourself and realized that was a grave mistake 

Then regret each step that you ever make 

Ignore the sweat that’s on my brow

Dreaming of our intimacies. 

I can still be... be... someone 

To hold you dear

Being so loving 

Accepting you without no other 

Right now...

All I want is to be...

Being 

In this moment 

Despite the noise

I just want to be...  

being (with you)

In the silence

So here we are

I just want to be....

Being (with you)

Right now...

All I want is to be...

Being 

SEASON (weathering changes)

In this season

The leaves fall

The many colors

How beauty disintegrates

Yet here we are

You and I 

Weathering changes

We don’t yet know. 

There’s no sound

No birds singing

The sky is pink

Is that snow?

In this season

It all dies

The ice forms and cracks

Below the unfortunates

Yet here we are

You and I

Weathering changes

We don’t yet know

In the thaw now

What is that I see

This greenery

Is that rain?

In this season

All is born

Becoming the things

We could only ever dream 

Yet here we are

You and I

Weathering changes

We don’t yet know

Daylight is gone

One day we could be 

More than basic themes 

The art behind what it seems

In The Here And Now

 

In this space 

No one else exists 

Just me and my self

Nothing else matters. 

I’ve lived for you

Gave up everything 

That was foolish

I’ve loved just you

While I was so wrong 

But now I see

In the here and now

We are all solitary 

There’s no you

No me or us

It’s only me 

In the here and now

In this space 

No one else exists 

Just me and my self

Nothing else matters. 

You lied to me

About everything

I was childish

You played a game

Now that moments gone

And now I see

In the here and now. 

I am here empty handed

I’m alone

No one else here

And I’m okay

In the here and now

In this space 

No one else exists 

Just me and my self

Nothing else matters. 

You were just another pawn

In what is the chessboard of life

At the moment you meant something 

Then we awoke in the Dawn 

A lingering dream of your strife

And then all your words mean nothing

In the here and now

Love, It’s all momentary 

It’s a lie

We all knew it

I live for this

In the here and now

In this space 

No one else exists 

Just me and my self

Nothing else matters. 

5 Steps

 You walk around like you know what we’re talking about

You’ve no idea as it’s so much higher than you 

Foolish foolish foolishness. 

I tried to be your friend

But you drag up fantasy. 

We were friends

But never again 

You tried so hard

To ruin my life

But I’m not dumb

I’m 5 steps ahead of a sociopath

Maybe it takes one to know one

Or the spawn of one to pretend 

You slide in my DMs like you should be there now

You don’t have any idea how wrong this all is. 

Empty empty emptiness 

I was once your best friend 

But you still live in a dream

We were friends

But never again 

You tried so hard

To ruin my life

But I’m not dumb

I’m 5 steps ahead of a sociopath

Maybe it takes one to know one

Or the spawn of one to pretend 

Walk on by

I don’t see your face 

Your pain and regret isn’t mine 

I refuse 

We were friends

But never again 

You tried so hard

To ruin my life

But I’m not dumb

I’m 5 steps ahead of a sociopath

Maybe it takes one to know one

Or the spawn of one to pretend 

Asshole/21

 

I’m not the asshole they say I am

Nor the asshole you’d expect with my ex

I am an asshole but of my own light 

The lovely asshole you’ve never met. 

I’m here

Radiating

In the light 

Of the past

I fear

Imagining 

In your mind 

Will not find

The truth.  What’s the truth?

We’ve come and gone so long

Just rest stops in this journey 

What’s this, mistaken kiss

So is it right or is it wrong 

Where does this become funny. 

I’m not young or dumb or full of....

Not am I twenty one 

I’m woke to things I wasn’t when...

I was just twenty one

I’m not the asshole they say I am

Nor the asshole you’d expect with my ex

I am an asshole but of my own light 

The lovely asshole you’ve never met. 

I’m now

Illustrious 

All despite 

Righteousness 

They bow

To all of us

But despite

Your emptiness. 

This point,  what’s the point?

Why do we play these games 

When we know each other’s self

Right now, where’s the wow

When it ends up the sames 

And alone with nothing left 

I’m not young or dumb or full of....

Not am I twenty one 

I’m woke to things I wasn’t when...

I was just twenty one

I’m not the asshole they say I am

Nor the asshole you’d expect with my ex

I am an asshole but of my own light 

The lovely asshole you’ve never met. 

I’m not him now

I wasn’t him then

You are dealing with the devil in between 

I’m not the asshole they say I am

Nor the asshole you’d expect with my ex

I am an asshole but of my own light 

The lovely asshole you’ve never met. 

Monochrome

 

What is brightness

In the darkness

A rainbow that doesn’t know

What it’s worth. 

And neither did I

When I fell in love with you

But now I see......

In a world of vibrant color

You’re monochrome 

With tastes of varied flavor 

Monochrome 

With a choice of so many tones

You’re monochrome 

And I’m numb to what has gone

Monochrome 

He doesn’t know

She will not show

A universe looking on

For a truth

And neither did I

When I fell In love with you 

But now I see......

In a world of vibrant color

You’re monochrome 

With tastes of varied flavor 

Monochrome 

With a choice of so many tones

You’re monochrome 

And I’m numb to what has gone

Monochrome 

This ignorance 

That emptiness 

A child will always love all

It’s simple

Until he learns

Despite his yearns

Hatred his parents still bare

And triple 

You say you’re color blind

Correct sir, if it ain’t white it ain’t right, ain’t that what you said.  

You’d take it back to the TV early days 

When black and white was just crackers on tv in monochrome. 

In a world of vibrant color

You’re monochrome 

With tastes of varied flavor 

Monochrome 

With a choice of so many tones

You’re monochrome 

And I’m numb to what has gone

Monochrome 

 

Oh DJ

I want to touch you 

But I’m timid

No matter how much you’re pulsing. 

I could one day be

A lover 

But I’m scared of myself right now

Despite reality

I want fantasy

You and I 

And nothing else. 

I’m dreaming.   

You and I could be

A fantasy

DJ play the songs 

That make me want to bump and grind

With someone who won’t ever be mine. 

I want to kiss you 

But I’m afraid

You’ll reject me yet you’re coming. 

I could be your life

Forever 

You won’t open yourself up these days 

Despite my candid lust

What can I just trust. 

Than my heart

Twisted beat

I’m living

You and I could be 

A reality.  

DJ play the songs 

That make me want to bump and grind

With someone who won’t ever be mine. 

Oh DJ

You don’t know

This song is about you

And how I lust for you

Am I wrong 

Oh DJ

DJ play the songs 

That make me want to bump and grind

With someone who won’t ever be mine.