How I Feel

Conversation fails me

Face to face I don’t have enough to say

But give me pen and paper

And it all falls out. 

The “how could you”’s

The beautiful allegory

Expressions of my heart 

Self expressions 

The solid truth of my story

Why I’m hear for a start 

Put me in a room with you and words fail me

I can better say with this barrier

It doesn’t change how I feel, for you

I put my best foot forward so you can see

So now let these truths be forever more 

It doesn’t change how I feel, for you

I look at you and smile

If you knew the thunderstorm in my head

So give me pen and paper

To work it all out 

Insecurities 

They’re all tied to my fantasies

Everything out of reach

Insecurities 

All these missed opportunities 

A lesson the universe has yet left to teach 

It’s just verbiage uttered by a simple man

Yet my mouth cannot move to do the deed

So do you know how I feel, for you 

No matter how you feel this how I am 

I asking take my hand and take the lead

So do you know how I feel l, for you

Early days, missed opportunities 

The regret of that first kiss 

Mistakes, all the things we could change 

Is it too late to remiss 

Put me in a room with you and words fail me

I can better say with this barrier

It doesn’t change how I feel, for you

I put my best foot forward so you can see

So now let these truths be forever more 

It doesn’t change how I feel, for you

It’s just verbiage uttered by a simple man

Yet my mouth cannot move to do the deed

So do you know how I feel, for you 

No matter how you feel this how I am 

I asking take my hand and take the lead

So do you know how I feel l, for you

Better Than Your Today

Bitter, toxic, you’re wasted 

For anything that could mean anything 

Burnt, scorned, and then you’re deflated 

How does it feel to be demasculated. 

I find that people like you

Hate theirselves more than anyone else.

So check yourself before you talk trash about anyone else. 

Despite It all

Despite all of you

Tomorrow will be better

Than your today...  it will be okay

Reject, evil, bless your heart

How does it feel to be oh so hated 

You’re ignored, so then do you lash out 

Because you’re continually rejected 

People like you see nothing 

Wrong with theirselves, it’s everyone else

Check yourself before you say something rash, this is about yourself. 

Despite It all

Despite all of you

Tomorrow will be better

Than your today...  it will be okay

Are you okay with it all

Why you’re so jaded. 

You have to be jaded

To fall into this hateful trap. 

I could almost forgive you.

But almost is never good enough 

You need to stand up and then accept

That you’ve been wrong about this 

Despite It all

Despite all of you

Tomorrow will be better

Than your today...  it will be okay

When you come clean

And accept reality 

Everything will be okay. 

Seeking Peace

I’m seeking peace

In spite of me

Can someone release me from me

I’m a danger to myself

My own worse enemy

Self destructive tendencies 

I fight to keep at bay

Fault belongs to no one else

Negative energy

Unrealistic fantasies 

From everything I say...

To myself, I lie to myself

Such a shame I can’t be true

To myself, I lie to myself. 

I’m seeking peace

In spite of me

Can someone release me from me

I’m seeking peace

Only for me

Can someone release me from me 

I’m drowning in this falsehood

Always reaching out for help

There’s no hero there for me

When no one knows my need

Everyone thinks that I’m good

But I’m damaged by a pelt 

To my soul that you can’t see

Stories I’ll only read

Of myself, I tell of myself

Such a shame I won’t be true

To myself, I lie to myself. 

I’m seeking peace

In spite of me

Can someone release me from me

I’m seeking peace

Only for me

Can someone release me from me 

I’m seeking peace

Just to save me

Can someone release me from me

For myself, some peace for myself 

I just want it to be true. 

For myself, I lie to myself 

I’m seeking peace

In spite of me

Can someone release me from me

I’m seeking peace

Only for me

Can someone release me from me 

I’m seeking peace

Just to save me

Can someone release me from me

I’m seeking peace

Because of me 

Can someone release me from me

Someone save me

From myself

Release me

From me

“You” Are a Myth

I’m sick and tired of giving everything to “you”

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

Fuck “you” and what “you” stand for I’m ready to go

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

You... oh you

Weren’t worth my time

Yet I gave you all of it. 

Such a waste of my time 

Love...  this love. 

Faded away

Wilted without attention. 

So what have you to say 

Questions

You won’t respond to

Answers 

You refuse to say

I’m sick and tired of giving everything to “you”

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

Fuck “you” and what “you” stand for I’m ready to go

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

“You” are a myth

Something I’ll no longer risk

Kiss it off and say goodbye 

Us... yes us

What are we now

Rather us be nothing 

Than a fantasy lie 

Me... whoa me 

I’ll be okay

I was raised to be strong 

With tools to carry on

Tell me

The truth of all this

I’m here 

For no one but me. 

I’m sick and tired of giving everything to “you”

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

Fuck “you” and what “you” stand for I’m ready to go

From now own my choices will be in my best interest. 

I Want To Believe

I’m a pessimist at heart

I’m scared of the ending before it starts 

The past has always repeated 

Constant trends that I want to end 

Give me something more than this 

A happy ending that starts with a kiss 

Am I’m dreaming of fairytales 

And too jaded to believe them

Years and years of wanting 

I still want to believe 

In love

I want to believe 

In love 

I’m still waiting for some hope

Something else here that could still help me cope 

With a love yet to be fulfilled 

Emotions that I still endure

Fantasy I’ve never know 

I’m still waiting for someone that could show

Me that I could yet still be wrong 

That all my dreams are not yet gone

Years and years of wanting 

I still want to believe 

In love

I want to believe 

In love 

With every breeze I want to believe 

Give me a future I want to see

Years and years of wanting 

I still want to believe 

In love

I want to believe 

In love

The Only One Out There For Me

Do you have any clue

Any insight

In what makes me

No of course you don’t 

You could never know

Why I do what I do 

See my light 

See just what I see

It’s okay you won’t 

I would never show

And I’d never tell

Never sell out

My emotions for anyone anymore 

I’m guarded to a fault 

Accepted what I was taught 

I’m the only one out there for me

I’m so scared from the past

Don’t think anything could last 

I’m the only one out there for me 

The truth is I’m broken

Accepted 

It’s my story

I try to let go

But that is so hard 

A love that’s unspoken

Rejected 

Lack of glory

It’s all that I know

I’ve said way too much. 

And I’d never tell

Never sell out

My emotions for anyone anymore 

I’m guarded to a fault 

Accepted what I was taught 

I’m the only one out there for me

I’m so scared from the past

Don’t think anything could last 

I’m the only one out there for me 

A glimpse behind the curtain

A look inside my psyche

I’m scared you know that much

Am I damaged beyond repair? 

I’m guarded to a fault 

Accepted what I was taught 

I’m the only one out there for me

I’m so scared from the past

Don’t think anything could last 

I’m the only one out there for me

Good On Paper

My hearts beating out my chest

Up my throat and pulsing in my head

Wondering just what it is I feel for you 

I don’t know what I feel, I don’t like it

We approach this thing cautiously

With a hope of monogamy 

For once in my life I’ve slowed things down

Hoping for something I’ve never found 

I’ve enjoyed every moment so far

You’re good on paper 

Could you be 

The one. 

From a distance all this could be great

It’s good on paper

Is that all?

Is it?

I’m still craving more of you and

It’s a month in and I’m not bored yet 

But I’m questioning if you feel the same now

And that makes me anxious, I don’t like it

All these guide less moves we still dance

And Without me guessing your stance   

I’m curious, so tell me what’s next 

Fingers crossed I’m hoping for the best 

I’ve enjoyed every moment so far

You’re good on paper 

Could you be 

The one. 

From a distance all this could be great

It’s good on paper

Is that all?

Is it?

Im here at the precipice

Take a leap or turn back

If you don’t bridge the gap

I’ll know what to do and rip the paper up

I’ve enjoyed every moment so far

You’re good on paper 

Could you be 

The one. 

From a distance all this could be great

It’s good on paper

Is that all?

Is it?