A Moment of Clarity

I see the truth
For what it is
I wasn’t good enough yet I still am

You lied on everything 
A perfect husband
A good lover
You never lived up 
To any of those promises. 

These moments of truth we said
Foolish dreams that I chased too long for you 
The truth and the lies
It’s neither here or there 
Now I’m aware of it  

A moment of clarity
Even if it doesn’t make sense right now. 
The truth and the lies
Behind your fantasy
I’m finally awake. 

I know the truth
And here it is
No one is ever good enough still I

Try and try and try
Notice me see me realize
I’m good enough

I refuse to believe it now
The old lies that held my self esteem down 
For better or worse
You words do not matter
Now that I know they’re fake 

A moment of clarity
Even if it doesn’t make sense right now. 
The truth and the lies
Behind your fantasy
I’m finally awake. 



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Time to Come Undone

It's been a few days since we've spoken So it's been a few days since we've fought And now you're reaching out to me Wanting to come and see me I don't know if you should I have to say I really miss you Your absence leaves me feeling incomplete But the peace and calm these past few days Make recent choices worth this loneliness Every second chance was just another battle Loving you never was logical But the comfort of this reprieve Makes these changes obvious It's time to come undone If I'm supposed to be better off Then why am I resisting the change Every ignored call takes effort To seem like I just don't care I know that just isn't fair But what's fair has never been the point It doesn't matter now. You had your chance, To put the effort in to fix us I told you then but if you forgot it... I won't, can't, I refuse to do this anymore Loving you wasn't logical And neither was staying so long This p...
Read more

STRIKE FIRST

I had suspicions... I'm a lovefool, but I'm weathered too Every time I voiced my fears, I was gaslit effortlessly Before I know it, I'm foolishly devoted to a con... a player Even through my adoring eyes I see y our words are... dubious So how do I find myself caught unaware With the conflicting lines, I got the truth half the time You were here getting even for things that were only your sins of thought I've heard of a preemptive strike But what you DO ... IT'S something new I'm left bewildered and confused End the war before I'm belligerent Strike First!  Obliterate, raze my heart with everyone If I wasn't so... brutalized by it I'd be in... awe The level of planning and imagining conspiracies If I hadn't gone through it, I'd say "Impossible!" How can you let someone love... you ... then ruin them for all time Of course I play the part you had set for me Armed with just suspicions, I acted out with vengeance ...
Read more

An Incomplete Collection

I've been fighting to keep this relationship coming to a hault Fearing an impending chaos too much for my already fracturing psyche  But all I'm finding at our end is unexpected calming silence Peace I haven't known since knowing you Was our love ever real Or are my feelings just a byproduct  Of you sociopathic mimicry To function out in the light There is one way lately you can always find me Curled up in confusion, Reeling either things just happened  Or anticipating what is next I never thought I'd ever come so close to death I could taste it twice It's like the scent at the base of your neck  Absent of anything just like the part in your eyes that should sparkle If there was ever love in your heart for me Or anyone like you claim It's really amazing your potential The amazing things, beyond your wants and needs Like love or whatever you could dream But sadly, like my recent ramblings  Just an incomplete collection of painful venom unnecessarily  I sit u...
Read more