The Sooner

I never wanted this, any of it
I wasn't looking for you,

Love, a relationship, at all. 
But once I fell I was all in
Regardless of warnings from everyone

Even now I foolishly believe
it will all work out like fantasy;
But this isn't fiction, just pure friction.
I'm ignoring the obvious, afraid of the pain
But it's starting to chafe

I need to stop blocking the heartache.
It's obvious it's coming,
alongside your last time. 
I've just got to accept the pain.
The sooner I do the sooner it ends. 

Why would I go into this unless I
wanted at least forever
but it hasn't been that long.
You're leaving before you arrive
if you leave me to believe that these days.

I'm not sure if our arguments now
are rooted in insecurities
or a defense mechanism you have.
When you stop falling in love and it's falling apart
coming down always hurts. 

I need to stop blocking the heartache.
It's obvious it's coming,
alongside your last time.
I've just got to accept the pain.
The sooner I do the sooner it ends.

I should have been willing
to go through with it months ago.
It's the only thing you've put effort into

I need -- ---- I need the heartache
It's obvious it's ------
-------- your last time
I've ---- got --- got --- the pain
--- ------ I do --- ------ it ends