Goodbye To You

 

I loved you.  

I hated you 

I wanted to be you 

Every word is about you 

Although I don’t want you. 

You influenced me in many ways 

But the you that I knew never stays

Goodbye to you

The lies in my past

Finding out the lies

Goodbye to you 

And things that won’t last

Whatever that brings 

What is true 

What you do 

I just had to be sure 

If anything was that pure 

A fantastical cure 

You said you loved me so many ways 

But the you I know always betrays 

Goodbye to you

The lies in my past

Finding out the lies

Goodbye to you 

And things that won’t last

Whatever that brings 

You were once the one 

Now just one that’s done 

And now that you’re gone

Goodbye to you

The lies in my past

Finding out the lies

Goodbye to you 

And things that won’t last

Whatever that brings 

A Lifetime of Misfires.

 

I see love all around me and

It brings back memories and hopes

And pains and regrets 

A lifetime of misfires.

The old fires still burn and hurt

Lessons learned lifetimes wasted 

But what if one day there is one

Who can heal me.  Love me truly

I want to be ready can I be really 

I want to be loved up 

To be the one

That blends with you 

But I don’t think

I can give myself that freely

Again

Huh, is this an opportunity. 

You came to me to try with hopes

Of things Of mistakes

A lifetime of misfires

Although it’s the past it does hurt 

It is a cycle fractured psyche

I want to be loved up 

To be the one

That blends with you 

But I don’t think

I can give myself that freely

Again

Shot my shot

A million times 

And here we are

Back again with no change 

I’m living a lifetime of misfires 

I want to be loved up 

To be the one

That blends with you 

But I don’t think

I can give myself that freely

Again

I’m the Dark

 

Right now god damn 

I want you need you 

Crave and lust you. 

Touch me feel me

In that way that makes me feel good

Make me throw my legs 

Voice up  give up

All my innocence 

Make me feel like I matter

And here we are

In the dark

Looking for the light 

The one who can save me

From the dark. 

I love the scam

That you are selling

Despite my being 

Love me own me

In the way that makes me worthy 

Even when it’s lies

Honesty interrupts 

This

I try and channel this thought 

And here we are

In the dark

Looking for the light 

The one who can save me

From the dark. 

Deeper and deeper I go

Darker and darker I see

Beyond that

I’m seeking light what’s right 

I’ll fight it all for the might

Beyond that 

Here we are

In the dark 

All alone

In the dark

It’s a cry

In the dark

A last chance

In the dark

And here we are

In the dark

Looking for the light 

The one who can save me

From the dark. 

I’m the dark

The light 

All that’s wrong 

And what’s right 

Alight. 

Hello and goodbye 

A Funny Thing (about love)

 

I want you to know

Although I have to let you go

I’ll always love you

We met by chance

Fell in love by circumstance

What is love at the end of the day 

But a feeling unreciprocated. 

You don’t know me

We don’t know each other 

But there’s a lot to be said

About love

It’s a funny thing

Difficult to say

What it means 

And how it feels

Love 

A treasure trove

Make it make sense. 

Now i want to grow 

But what else right now can you show 

I do this for you. 

Despite your stance 

I see beyond the ignorance 

What is this right now who has a say 

What is this moment but rejection 

What do you see

Beyond us but further 

There’s a lot still to be done 

About love 

It’s a funny thing

Difficult to say

What it means 

And how it feels

Damn

Dumb fool

Wanting it all 

Without nothing 

But what about

About love 

It’s a funny thing

Difficult to say

What it means 

And how it feels

Summerland

 Let me try to tell you about a place

It doesn’t exist but it does

A place of jaded memories 

Summerland. 

Blissful summers

And some merry Christmases 

Full of lies 

A town of many names

Nothing ever stuck

Maybe because it is all bullshit 

I was an outsider looking in on the town limits 

I saw the lies told between childhood friends 

And I saw the ignorance in government. 

If I didn’t ever live there I would waste my time to say it’s a sham

Not that anyone cares

They are all tone deaf

And left for dead. 

Scattered and disfractured  in this 

Illusion of everything now

That’s real or a lie that we tell

Summerland

Tales of lies we

Told each other to believe. 

Yet we did

In the dark on their word 

Depending on some luck. 

Sometimes none of this makes any sense 

I was a native living the lie on my life to thrive 

But no one ever knew me nor do they 

Let me die

 

I don’t want to be here any more

Beyond the physical the ethereal 

The here and now the beyond. 

You don’t know the pain 

That drives someone insane 

A sip of wine numbs the pain

It doesn’t matter. 

How much noise I make

No one hears me

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries 

Fuck the truth what else could be in store 

Life and death is just the scrape of the eternal. 

But what do you want me to do 

What else can I gain

Not looking in my brain

The liquor makes it quicker 

Eases the chatter

Of my old mistakes 

No one feels me

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries 

The willingness to no longer be here

Consumes me, envelops me. 

If you feel that way call 

Eight hundred two seven three eighty two fifty five 

The drugs make me numb to it

Makes thinking vacant 

An empty thought of life 

No one knows me 

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries

Let me die

No more lies

Or the tries 

I Want It Raw

 

A barrel to the head 

and fuck decorum

I want it raw

Live or die

Love or lie

Give it to me

Right now

I’m not trying to make friends 

I’m trying to find lovers 

Don’t see me as a friend

Just See me as the last chance

The best chance you ever had. 

Your parents would object

I’m no one to them

But to me

In this moment

It’s suicide like a 

A barrel to the head 

and fuck decorum

I want it raw

Live or die

Love or lie

Give it to me

So what 

Is this romantic bullshit 

Lovers or fuck friends right now 

We tread until the end 

What do you see in this stance 

Even if all this fails so bad 

Your loves wouldn’t admit 

I’m one Of them

But in me

Only I can 

Save me from that 

A barrel to the head 

and fuck decorum

I want it raw

Live or die

Love or lie

Give it to me

Love is raw

I want it

Hate is raw

I want it

Loss is raw

I want it

Death is raw

I want it

A barrel to the head 

and fuck decorum

I want it raw

Live or die

Love or lie

Give it to me

Does anyone know

How much I want it raw